What got my attention were the very first few sentences in the message I got in my inbox. I’m going to let you in on some of the information in that personal message. Rest assured, I will not betray the confidence of my good friend who sent me that message.
After the customary salutation, it continued,
“I just wanted to bring to your attention that you have not posted a blog entry since Aug 26. In 2 weeks that will make it two months.”
The facts were undeniably on point! I let those words marinate. As I tried to dissect them hoping they were not meant for me, it felt as though the cold heavy hand of truth had made contact unexpectedly with my cheeks.
But for the other sentences, I would have convinced myself that, someone had actually slapped me.
What I translated as, ‘you’re busted buddy’, came out more lovingly as,
“Just wanted to let you know I noticed.”
And with the concern and a gentle probe of a loving friend, my heart was warmed by,
“Hope all is well with you!”
Needless to say, this message and several others that followed left me with a sense of hope, and a renewed responsibility to my faithful followers, readers, and a watching world that might benefit from my thinking ways of looking at life.
So I’m breaking my long silence with some sort of explanation.
For some time now, I have lived with a sneaking suspicion that something was not quite right. This feeling is quite difficult to describe. My inactivity in posting fresh contents clearly betrayed my state.
First of all, I’m doing well. No health issues here thankfully!
It is a different story if I were to talk about my literary health.
Generally, it is easy for me to write passionately about subjects I choose to write about. But recently, it has been very difficult to simply sit and complete many blogs that I have started to compose. I would simply loose the punch to continue. It felt like the passion that made my fingers dance on the keyboard would suddenly ooze out of me as though letting air out of a balloon.
Further, I noticed I was not feeling as sharp! Dullness was the order of the day. A sort of uninteresting, insipid, frustration characterized most days. I was also getting restless thinking life must go on especially realizing the countless responsibilities I have.
In all this, I could feel my creative juices flowing (albeit like molasses) but I could not translate that into completed blogs. In my head, it was like spaghetti, I did not know where the end was from the beginning.
In frustration, as I wondered for many days what was wrong with me. It hit me that I have been working relentlessly for months without any breaks! My work involves a lot of brain power. Also as a thinker by nature, I have been thinking about some intense life issues. So work, work, work, strategizing, planning, executing, thinking, work and more work, all the while expecting brilliant results got me bored and dull!
The ‘saw’ needs to be sharpened! What an insight! Just what I needed. . . . a break to rejuvenate, retool, and re-launch!
Now, I believe what I have heard for so long a time. Creative types like me go through some ‘dark’ periods. I have experienced and now accept that as part of life.
Mountains and valleys. .
Days and nights. . . .
Winters and Summers. .
. . . and Pendulums only swing up when they have swung low! Such is life!
So I took a well-deserving break and did some travels to break the persistent doldrums and monotony that blocked a free flow of fresh content among other things. I’m so thankful that my good friend noticed! What an inspiration!
I’m back in the saddle, let’s continue to gaze into the maze of life!
Have you experienced moments of animated Blahs? What helped you come back to ‘life’?